November photos

Earlier this month Grandmo came to preschool with us. Makena had so much fun. She always does, I wish we could attend more often! Tomorrow we have our first field trip. Pam took the day off so she could come too. :) We're going to Hidden Villa, I've never been so I was excited... but now it's supposed to be raining so I'm not excited.

Makena's been very into dressing up lately, and she doesn't differentiate between the box of dress up clothes and her real clothes. When it's time to get dressed sometimes she brings me clothes like this and tells me what order to put them on. Actually sometimes she'll lay out an outfit, and she even puts the undies under the pants and stuff. It's very cute/clever.

The boys Pam watches came over the other day for lunch and to play for a bit. Notice that one is in Makena's fairy costume... and both boys are busy playing with the princess castle. They asked Makena to come play with them but she said no, that she was busy being a super hero. Lol. I love her!! That cape was a fantastic gift she got last year for Christmas.

We went to school with Colin again, and they played so nicely together. The teacher asked if they were siblings, and said they are both so sweet. And they really are! He's the closest thing Makena has for a sibling. She's been saying she wants a little sister recently. There's a book where she always points out the mommy, mama, herself, and "my little sister!" :/ I really wish it was easy to get her a sibling.

When it was time for the adults to go to the meeting, I stayed behind but "hid" a bit so that Makena thought I was gone. I was curious how she'd do, and she was totally fine. They played inside for a while and I peeked in from outside, then they ran outside to play and I snuck in the back door to watch from inside. I think she did so well because her buddy was with her, they played together the whole time. I really enjoyed watching them! I was a bit dismayed to see her climb UP the slide, something she knows is totally not allowed. At one point Makena's shoe came off and he tried to help her put it on. She was stranded on the slide, and couldn't get her shoe on. I stayed back, I wanted to see what would happen. Eventually one of the aides noticed and put it on for her, and a few minutes later I heard Makena crying. I looked out the window and she was holding something and crying, and there was a little boy on the ground crying. She seemed upset, not hurt, and I wanted to refrain from stepping in to help since I could tell she wasn't seriously in need of my assistance. But she came inside and the other adults were returning anyway, so I hugged her and she was alright. Apparently the other kid tried to take the map from her and she pulled it away.

We were invited by Pam's co-teacher to celebrate Diwali with her family. We had a great dinner and played with sparklers. Makena loved the outfit she borrowed.

Things Makena said she was thankful for-

She's been wanting a bed for her stuffed animals/baby dolls, and I made this little crib out of a box!

Cleaning up some paint brushes turned in to painting the bathroom sink!

During a tea party she said she wanted her kitty Donte to have tea too.

I was in the kitchen and found she had unrolled almost a whole floss container. She was calling it her horsie seat belt...

We got these fortunes the other day... in 2 months it'll be Makena's birthday, and we're hoping to visit the snow, so hopefully this means it'll happen!!

Thanksgiving at my parent's house-

On growing up.

I usually think about how I wish I could slow down time. I love Makena so much as she is right now, and I know I'll always love her but right now, in her sweet silly loving way, I feel like I'm at the most intense loving stage. I know that doesn't make sense. Basically, she's just so incredibly awesome nowadays. And a lot of the time I get worried about those awful "what ifs" that the future holds, so I just want to keep her as she is right now. Safe and with me almost 24/7. Some day she'll spend large parts of the day away from me, and while that's okay, it also terrifies me. Nothing in the world would be worse than something happening to her, except something happening while I'm not with her. I don't think I'd ever forgive myself.

So sometimes, when I feel worried that she's growing up, I make myself remember that as she gets older the dangers change. Maybe her running into the street or drowning or being kidnapped isn't as much as a threat when she's a 15 year old. There will be other things to worry about- her getting into cars with other drivers, sleepovers and possible natural disasters happening while I'm not with her.

And I need to tell myself that life is scary, and fragile, and for too many people their worst nightmares come true. So many things can go wrong with all the bad in this world. I feel this very real sense that something tragic is waiting in the distance somewhere, and it freaks me out. Then again, I felt that for most of my pregnancy and that turned out just fine! I believe in positive thinking, and manfesting good things by good thoughts. But all becomes so very overwhelming when I imagine the possibilities.

Life is also so precious and wonderful and there is so much good. I know that there has to be rain in order for rainbows, so I don't mind the small setbacks. I just fear the storms that are insurmountable.

So. I find myself not sure what to think.  Yes, I am sad that she's growing up and a little further away from the safety of my arms. But she's moving towards being more self dependant, where I won't be riddled with worry any time she's not by my side. I know I'll always worry about her, but my worrying will shift to new fears.

And for now I get to enjoy the closeness we share and her amazingness at this almost 3 years old age, and try not to think about anything other than focusing on all the great parts of right now. At this moment she is asleep next to me.  She's on her crib mattress, but her left leg, right arm, and top of her head are on my mattress. Her hand is a few inches from my arm. She just let out a soft content sleepy sign. Most nights I make sure to take a few minutes to connect with her sleeping self, I'll hold her hand or kiss her forehead. Some day I'll ache for this closeness.

October 16th through Halloween

We had so much fun making fresh pasta. Makena is an awesome helper in the kitchen. These are the things I couldn't wait for, cooking and craft projects with my own child!

We made this count down chain in anticipation of seeing Disney On Ice. Makena woke each morning excited to break the piece off and count how many days were left. I have a cute idea for one to count down to Christmas and then to her birthday!

We had a fun day at the pumpkin patch at Lemos Farm with Emily and her parents!

We went to see the movie Brave with my mom and Ian and Colin's family. Makena got a little restless, but she enjoyed the movie. When it was over she started to cry. The ending is a little scary so I thought she was just scared, but when she finally calmed down enough to speak she said she was sad the movie was over. "Want MORE Brave movie!!!!" Lol.

She's really been enjoying our preschool day. Wednesdays are a highlight!

She finally named her dolls. Every time we'd ask their names she just said "I don't know" or "baby." But then one night she called them- Susie Sunshine (like a doll on the TV show Doc McStuffin's), baby doll, and Katy Blue. Hahahahaha!

 

For Halloween she wanted to dress up as Minnie Mouse for months, but in early September we walked into one of those Halloween super stores and she spotted an Ariel costume. She insisted that's what she wanted to be. So I bought a cheap used costume from craigslist, but neither of us were thrilled with it. Makena said it needed a green tail. (For some reason most of the official Disney Ariel costumes have blue skirts.) I decided I was up for the task of making her costume myself. We went to the fabric store and she selected green sparkly fabric and I picked purple fabric with blue bias tape for the top. Then I got to work! I was thrilled with how easily it all came together.

I put a real starfish on the skirt, and I glittered buttons to embellish the shirt. Then we bought an Ariel wig and I couldn't find a hair clip I liked, so I made one! I bought a Kanzashi flower bow maker and it was so simple! I loved how the costume came out. Her shoes were a pair of cheap used white Mary Jane type shoe that I covered with green and purple glitter. I forgot to take a photo of them, and she wore them to school Halloween morning and the glitter peeled off. :/ That was the only bummer, so overall it was a major success!

We went to a party at The Little Gym and Makena had fun doing crafts and playing carnival games for prizes. It was a really fun free event!

At school on Halloween she was so excited to wear her costume. I forgot her top at home, I was so disappointed! She had a long sleeved purple shirt since it was chilly, so it looked fine but wasn't as special! She wore the wig for about an hour then was done. She made a ghost painting with rolling marbles.

And ghost biscuits.

After picking up Pam we killed some time at the Junior museum then went to the house where Pam nannies and had a pizza party then did a little trick or treating in Palo Alto. (I was Flounder, I sewed blue stripes and some sheer fabric onto a yellow shirt and bought a Flounder hat online.)

Then we went to Los Altos to trick or treat with our buddies! 3rd year in a row we've done this together. :) It was Makena's highlight of the evening. We had a blast! The kids were so sweet and cute. They knocked and said "trick or treat!" and "thank you!"

Last but not least we went to Cupertino to meet up with my mom and her friend Maddy. My mom was a jellyfish, in keeping with the Little Mermaid/sea theme!

It was a great day, we were so proud of how grown up Makena is! She was out later than usual, but she napped which is so incredibly rare.

We took her bank into the grocery store to count up her money in the coin machine. I thought there'd be under $10 in there, it was mostly pennies. We were shocked with the total! She had $74!! The machine took a portion for it's fees, but we gave her the full amount. Makena's got some Christmas shopping to do!